


Nothing Lasts Forever

by ShippyBich



Category: Guns N' Roses
Genre: (I typed cheating as chesting smh), Angst, But not bad smut, Cheating, Depression, M/M, Smut, but it's like sad smut, theres never bad smut, unless its in My Immortal
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-12-07 03:54:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11615346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShippyBich/pseuds/ShippyBich
Summary: When Izzy starts acting different, that hurts Axl.When Izzy quits Guns N' Roses, that hurts Axl more.When Izzy runs off, leaves him behind in L.A, starts a new band, a new life without him, that hurts Axl the most.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is sad af, but don't worry. There's a sequel *wink wink*

**November, 1991**

Sometimes Axl regretted telling Izzy to "stop dancing with Mr. Brownstone". Izzy had become a different person from what he was before, on the drugs or before them. He was now more solemn, more frustrated, more depressed. Axl had tried relentlessly to brighten him up a bit. Nothing ever worked on Izzy anymore, not even Axl's charm (that Izzy used to always tell Axl he had. Used to).

Axl needed to talk to Izzy about all of this. He loved Izzy, but he had to know what was going on with him. Unfortunetly, Izzy was like a walnut now, and Axl didn't have a nutcracker.

That was another thing. They both used to tell each other everything that was going on. Their thoughts, their worries, their dreams. Now, Izzy was always so distant, even with him. And as for Axl, most of what came up, even if it was important, resulted in him shying away from talking to Izzy about it, in which he never used to do before now. And the rare times when he did have conversation with Izzy, Axl always felt awkward talking to him. He always had to direct the conversations that they had together now, but all Izzy really did was nod his head or mumble the occasional "mhm" or "yeah".

Although it seemed that not only the words they spoke to each other had become fewer, but it seemed that their interaction as a whole had become lesser as well. Izzy had seemed to treat Axl just like any other person to him a lot of the time now, when before he had made it clear to anyone who saw them together that Axl was his everything.

It hurt Axl knowing that Izzy might not of seen him in the same way as he used to anymore, even if they were still in a relationship. He hoped despite everything, that Izzy still felt as much love for him as he had before all of this had come up with his problems.

Since being raised under the "care" of his turned out step-daddy dearest, Stephen, Axl had never been the one to involve much religion in his life. But since Izzy had turned into what he was now, Axl prayed every single night to whatever was up in the sky that things could change back into what they were. Back to when he and Izzy were genuine. Back to when he and Izzy were passionate. Back to when he and Izzy were real.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shitez goez daown (lyke ur IQ aftar reedding mee tyepe lyke dis)

Axl had finally decided that he was going to confront Izzy about his behavior. It wasn't only really hurting him knowing that Izzy was like this now, but it was ruining the band.

They weren't like everyone else on the scene. They didn't just put in, put out people like a sports team. They weren't some fabricated mess for the sakes of prophet sales, they were in the music business for the music.

Of course, since they weren't those guys that just replaced people like they were nothing (Axl still felt guilty about Steven), that obviously meant that they were close. Some closer than others, but close none the less.

When someone wasn't feeling right, it showed. Everyone else in the band wouldn't feel right either until that person was okay. They gave a damn.

And even though caring might have made things better, it sure as hell made things feel a lot worse.

**

The band had just finished their last show in London, and were currently in some hotel. Slash and Duff were probably off getting high and fucking  ~~each-other~~  groupie bitches, Izzy was out somewhere, and Axl was waiting for him to come back.

He saw the turn of the doorknob, and waited until he saw a familiar figure step into the room before he opened his mouth to say, "Izzy?"

When Izzy didn't respond, Axl repeated himself louder.

"Izzy?"

"Yeah?" He said back.

"Izzy, I need to talk to you about something."

He nodded his head for Axl to continue.

"Izzy, you're not the same anymore. Something's up. You're so distant, it's like you're not even apart of the band anymore. It's like...it's like you're not apart of us anymore..."

"Well, about the band thing...Axl...I quit," he said calmly.

"You WHAT?" Axl yelled at him.

"Shh, calm down baby, it's okay," he said.

"No it's NOT. You start acting all reclusive, you start acting like you don't care about us anymore, about me anymore, and then you go and QUIT?"

"Billy, you don't understand," he said, "Look Billy, there's some things I used to be able to put up with before, that I can't put up with now. It's not the same anymore. It's not what I thought it was. It's not what I wanted it be."

"Well what DID you want it to be?"

"I want it to GO somewhere, that's what I want! I want it to have a point!"

"It DOES!" Axl screamed. He was wondering how Izzy didn't get it.

"Oh really then? Then what is the point of this then? What's the point of working our asses off writing music, only to be trapped in arenas full of screaming people, only to go off afterwards, get stoned and fuck random groupies? What kind of life is that, Billy?"

"It's not about all of that stuff, Jeffrey! It's about the music! You've written most of our lyrics, you should know! It's about being able to channel your emotions somewhere safe, it's about the flow, the release! It's about being able to express yourself without repent!"

"The music is one thing, but what about everything else? It might be okay for you, but what about me? Billy, it's just not worth it anymore!"

Axl could feel his eyes starting to moisten. He felt defeated, a way he hadn't felt in a long time... "...I just wanted you to be happy, Jeffrey. I thought you were, but I guess I was wrong."

"Billy, it's the band that's been bringing me down. Performing, just all of it. I couldn't take it anymore. I had to get out. I'm sorry Billy."

"...do you at least still love me?" Axl asked. That was his main reason he wanted to talk to Izzy, before all this stuff about quitting the band came up.

"Of course I do," said Izzy.

"Okay..."

Izzy went over and embraced him. He hated to see his little Billy in pain, but he wasn't sure how to fix everything. However, there were still some things that he still hadn't told Axl...

**

A few days later, they were all back in L.A. But after Axl had woken up the morning after they had gotten back from touring, he noticed something. Izzy wasn't there.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boom shakalaka btw this all of the chapters are gonna be around this length hopefully it was just the introduction one that was shorter.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, where did Izzy go? Is he coming back? We'll see...

Axl was trying to convince himself that Izzy had just gone out to run some errands. Since Izzy had been acting different, Axl had been worrying about him just upping and leaving one day. It was one of his worst fears...

He got up and got ready. He figured just because he was stressed out about the Izzy situation didn't mean that he had an excuse to do nothing all day. But as he sat up on their bed, he noticed something else. There was a note on the bedside table.

Axl leaned over to pick it up and read it. He noticed that there was a 10 numbers scrawled onto it in messy handwriting. A phone number. He thought it looked like whoever wrote it was in a hurry. And by 'whoever wrote it', Axl meant the only person who could have wrote it, the person's name that was written the same way as the set of numbers above it: Love, Izzy

**

Axl wasn't sure how to react. Why would have Izzy given him a phone number? Axl already knew his phone number. They fucking lived together, for God's sake. Unless...Izzy wasn't there anymore.

And just like that, Axl going over to the phone on the wall and dialing that number. Izzy was about to be bombarded with questions. He held the phone up to his ear, waiting for someone, anyone to pick up and tell him what happened. He heard the ringing in his ear, and then the worst thing he could of heard: an automated message. Izzy wasn't on the line.

Axl felt his hands start to get shaky. He tried to come up with possible excuses to why Izzy didn't answer him. Maybe he was driving? Maybe he was out somewhere else where he didn't have a phone at hand? Maybe he just didn't care anymore...

Axl hoped that wasn't the case. It couldn't of been. Izzy would never do that to him, would he? Izzy had never just stopped talking to him. Of course, Izzy had never gotten up and left without notifying Axl first either. He always thought it was funny how things seemed to  _change..._

**

Axl stayed in their room all day, calling the number every ten minutes, hoping someone would answer back. As he picked up and held the phone to his ear for the umpteenth time, he heard a familiar voice on the line.

"Hello?" Izzy asked.

"Jeffrey Dean Isbell, where the hell are you?" Axl said, putting emphasis on each word. Despite being worried sick about him, Axl still had a lot of words for that man.

"Oh, Axl! Guess what, I'm in New York!" Izzy said excitedly.

"NEW YORK?"

"Whoa baby, calm down, it's okay, I'm just here temporarily. I'll be back in, say, a year or two?"

Axl stood there in shock. What the hell did he just fucking say?

"Why did you leave me behind in L.A? Lafayette was different, but why did you not even tell me you were leaving?" Axl was still by far not done with him.

"I...listen, it was a last minute decision. I needed to get a fresh start, see what I could do without Guns N' Roses. I booked the tickets last night, I would've told you then but you were already dealing with a lot of other things. I didn't want to make it any worse."

"Oh...", Axl said, "But still, you could of at least taken me with you! I would've payed for my own ticket and everything!"

"I would pay for a private jet for you if I had to. That's not the point though, the point is you couldn't just leave the band behind."

"Like you did?"

"Yes, like I did. But I'm different then you, anyone can come and replace me, you not so much. You're the lead singer of the band, Axl. That's playing a much bigger role than rhythm guitarist. And besides, I didn't think you wanted to quit. If you had wanted to, of course I would have taken you with me."

"I would quit if it meant I could be with you right now."

"Axl, that's crazy. This band, music, it's your dream. You wouldn't of been happy if you came with me. You would be away from everything you know."

"I was away from everything I knew when we left Lafayette to live in L.A. That turned out fine."

"You didn't have anything there in Lafayette that you really cared about. Amy and Stu maybe, but you got them out of there anyways. L.A is different. L.A is where your life is. Your real life."

"My real life is wherever you are."

Axl loved the band, but he loved Izzy more. He didn't even care if Izzy was only in New York temporarily. A few weeks was one thing. But a **year? Two years?** That was completely different.

"I know your upset now, but you'll be glad you didn't come with me. Besides, so far, New York ain't all that. There's bugs and rats everywhere, and I'm pretty sure there's people fucking right above my room right now. Do you know how hard it's gonna be to sleep with that going on?"

Axl giggled and said, "Okay, okay, you win. But I'm calling you every single day though. You prepared for that?"

"I bet l'll beat you to it."

"Love you, Jeffrey."

"Love you too, Billy."

Axl waited for Izzy to hang up. He couldn't bring bring himself to do it.

"You still there?" Izzy asked.

"Yeah. I don't wanna hang up the phone. Can you do it for me?"

"Sure. Love you."

"Love you too."

"Bye."

"Bye." He heard the beep. Izzy hung up.

Axl felt a lot better now. He was still a little put off about Izzy not even telling him beforehand that he was leaving, but Izzy had made some good points. Axl didn't want to leave the band (he would have still left for Izzy), it really was his passion in life. But at least he knew now that Izzy was okay. And even if they wouldn't be seeing each other in person for awhile, Axl could live with that. Izzy still loved him, even if he wasn't in L.A for the time being. As long as Axl knew that, he would be okay too.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, everything's okay now. But what if something happened and they really were separated from each other? Hmm, we'll see soon...


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kept typing "Thangsgiving" instead of "Thanksgiving"

**2 Weeks Later**

"Happy Thanksgiving, Gingersnap." Izzy said into the phone.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Gypsy Boy."

Even though Axl would have called him just as willingly, he was still glad Izzy stuck to what he had said about calling him first.

"So, how's everything going back in L.A?" Izzy asked.

"Alright, I guess. We have a little break from touring for the rest of the year, but by January we'll be back at it."

"That's good."

Izzy was about to say something about them touring back when he was in the band, but he decided against it. Axl had seemed like he was getting better about them being long distance for a while, he didn't want to fuck it all up again.

"So, what are you thankful for, Little Gypsy?" Axl asked.

He already knew what Izzy's answer would be, just like Izzy already knew what his would be. The question had become a lovey tradition for the two of them. Not to mention the butterflies Axl still felt in his stomach when Izzy said (or did) anything affectionate towards him.

"You," Izzy said expectedly, but not any less valued, "What about you, my little red head?"

"You," Axl said.

"Are you blushing?" Izzy asked teasingly.

"Maybe," Axl said, drawing the word out.

"Damn, and we haven't even gotten to the phone sex yet."

Axl laughed and said, "Sometime soon, Jeffy. Sometime soon."

"You better keep your word to that. Hey, I gotta go take care of some things. I'll be back in a few hours. Love you."

"Love you too." Axl said, and waited on the line until Izzy hung up about five seconds later.

**

"So Axl, how's it been going for you?" Slash asked.

The other person that Axl was truly close with other than Izzy, was the one and only Saul Hudson. Or as he liked to be called, Slash.

"Okay, I guess. I really do miss him a lot. More than he knows. Do you think he misses me too?"

"Of course he misses you too. That man is crazy about you, Axl."

"Yeah, you're probably right Slash."

"I know I am. Trust me."

"Okay," Axl said, giving in. Leave it to Slash to calm him down in his flights of fear. Even though he and Izzy had the strongest relationship out of anyone else in the band, Axl had to admit that he and Slash still had an inexplanable bond since the day they'd met.

"...So, have y'all had phone sex yet?"

"SLASH!...okay, I told him we would. So, we're like, expecting some." Axl felt some heat on his face. 

"You crazy kids," Slash fake sighed.

"You're younger than us."

"Not mentally."

"Alright, you win," Axl admitted in defeat.

"That's what I thought." Slash said and flashed a grin at him.

It was no wonder to Axl how Slash handled all of those "pet" snakes that he had so well. If Slash could charm him, he could charm anyone.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short, I know. But the next chapter is hella more exciting, if things go according to plan ;)

**Author's Note:**

> I promise I'll post something happier soon aka straight (gay) sin cause I'm either angsty, smutty or both lol


End file.
